Welcome to Sad Salvation. Day by day by day by day ... this is my attempt to make sense of the world.

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Saturday, March 16, 2002

Inverse Ego Surf

dj "joe h" karaoke...I have to think that Cathy is the person who searched for this.

I am thrilled that I come up on the search for east west karate warminster pennsylvania. Even if it is on the second page.

read "Cathedral" Carver

I still have more "Patty Herst" even after I fixed the spelling on that page.

- Rich, 9:44 AM |

Friday, March 15, 2002

Friday Five

1. What's your favorite animal? I love watching birds fly. I always wish I could fly.

2. What pets have you had in your lifetime? I have only had some fish. My mother, one of my sisters, and one of my brothers were allergic to most pets. Since I moved out of the house, I have always lived places I could not have pets.

3. Is there any specific pet that you've wanted but never had? Why? I think I might want a cat. Since I moved out of the house, I have always lived places I could not have pets. I would only want a dog if someone else was responcable for it.

4. Are you allergic to any animals? Some cats, some dogs,but not many.

5. Do you have any 'pet' pet peeves (your pets or others')? People that do not train their dogs.

- Rich, 10:27 PM |

Work and other ideas

As of today I have been at TiVo for 2.5 years. That is 30 months if you are counting. I do not want to even think about how many hours I have spent here. I have worked here longer then any other job I have had. At this rate I will work here longer then any other two jobs.

This week my department had the last scheduled round of force reductions. It has been in the works for months now, but it was still hard. It was hard to see people take the news. I did not feel very good about work yesterday. I am happy that I am not getting laid off. In this job environment I should be happy to have a job. It still made me feel bad to have a job while these other people were asked to go.

In the long run, I am worried about my job. I do not know when someone is going to decide that my job is not part of the next business plan. I really like the company I work for, but I want to get away from my department. In the past I have tried to change departments. I have never been successful in the past. I was seen by too valuable by my department. It might have saved me; those jobs were eliminated in previous layoffs. Now I feel that I should get away from where I am not. I can see my job being disposable in the future. I have to find the right way to do all these things. I am not sure I can do it without leaving myself open to other problems.

I just found out that one of my other friends here is leaving. He decided to resign as the result of a bad review. He told me that the job no longer excited him. His experence is one the job stops exciting him, he cannot keep the job. His work suffers and he is soon let go. This time he decided to resign before he was let go. There is something shocking about this. I know that I loose my excitement from time to time. I am not afraid of being let go as a result. My review is next week. I think that I am going to have a good review. Now I just have to wait and see.

- Rich, 1:36 AM |

Thursday, March 14, 2002

Going Cross Country

I have been thinking about my prosepctive trip cross country. There are too arguments that keep runing through my head.

1) I might be biting off more then I can chew.
verse
2) If I do not do this now, I will not get the chance to do it again.

Both of these ideas are eating at me. I am not sure which one is going to win. It costs a lot of money to drive cross country. I think there might be better ways for me to spend that money. I can pay off some bills or save up for a new car. I am always spending my money this way and paying for it later.

The other side of that argument is that it is just money. A friend of my said that he spend all of his "dot.com boom" money on a boat. He has been racing the boat for the last three years. The money and the boat are gone now. He would not trade it for the world. It is the experence that is important. If I do not do this now, I will never get this experence.

Now is the right time in my life for me to do this. I am only responcable for myself. I do not have a house or a family to worry about. I am the only person that can be effected by a bad decision. I should just relax. If it is too much money, I will make up for it later.

I will decide after my trip to Portland. It depeneds how that goes. It is my test for driving cross country.

- Rich, 5:33 PM |

{angry fist waving in the air}

It is really fustrating when Blogger is down. It is worse when I can get to my regular Blogs, but not the Pro Blogs. This morning there was a two hour power outage at work. After the power comes back on, all the tools are out of whack. That was wasted time. Once everything is working again, no one wants to get back to work. My life seems to be full of time sucks.

- Rich, 5:28 PM |

Wednesday, March 13, 2002

Right now someone at a university is calling the staff at The Onion a group of evil misogynists. I just think they are really funny. Tell me what you think.

- Rich, 6:01 PM |

Without the Goatee II

Yesterday my friend Peter said, "Hey, It is Frank Zappa." I have the same facial hair he had, but I feel no connection to Frank Zappa. I just never got Frank Zappa.

- Rich, 10:48 AM |

Tuesday, March 12, 2002

Without the Goatee

I would like to know that people think of the pictures without the goatee.

- Rich, 11:45 PM |

Tuesday Too

1.) Lucid dreaming is operationally defined as knowing that you are dreaming while you're dreaming. Does dreaming (lucid or ordinary) play a significant role in your life? Are you a lucid dreamer? I keep a dream journal and I have always found dreams to be important to me. I am never quite sure what my dreams mean, but I am never shy about telling people my dreams. I am not a lucid dreamer.

2.) If you are a survivor of a failed relationship, can you tell me one reason you're glad the relationship is over? It doesn't matter if you're the "leavee" or the "leaver". I have been single for as long as most people can remember. It is long enough ago that I cannot answer this question.

3.) You have been selected to put one thing in a ship that travels to far end of universe (god knows where that is). What do you put in and why? I would put on a copy of my journal/weblog. I think they might want to see how an average person lives.

- Rich, 5:45 PM |

Monday, March 11, 2002

Sleep

I have a headache, but I do not want to go to sleep. Right about now I wish I could go without sleep. I know that is something that will never happen. I have never been the type of person that operates well without sleep. I will get to the point where I will just want to sleep anywhere.

Lately I have been waking up later and later. I have been pushing back the time I leave for work. I used to get to work at least 15 minutes early every day. Now I am getting in right on time. It will not be too much time before I am arriving late everyday.

I wasted today and I know that is why I do not want to go to bed yet. It is currently Monday morning, but I am still trying to redeam my Sunday. I am not sure it is going to really work that way. Maybe I am tired enough now to go to bed.

- Rich, 2:17 AM |

Shaving

I could not fall asleep, so I decided to take a shower. I stayed up really late last night. I slept to 2 PM this afternoon. I tried to fall asleep round midnight. It just was not happening. I did not have what it takes to meet the sandman.

When I got out of the shower I decided to shave off my goatee. Last Monday I trimmed my goatee pretty far. I was trying to see how far I could grow my goatee. When I first moved to San Jose I had a goatee long enough that a guy I worked with gave me the nickname of Tut, after the old Batman TV show villain. I wanted to see if I could get it that long again, but it seemed to be took ragged this time. I trimmed it, but no one said anything about it.

I have had my goatee long enough that I do not remember the last time I shaved it off. I think I last shaved it off back in 2000. It is strange when I shave it off. It is like the shape of my face changes. Here are some pictures of me with the goatee. I will have to get someone to take pictures of me now.

As I shaved I thought about this guy Rodger. I worked for him back in college. He was in the university print shop. He had the oddest shave that I had ever seen. Later I realized that he never used a razor. He shaved only with scissors. Rodger was a Vietnam Vet and he had a couple of breakdowns. I always wondered how thest things related to each other. I was once told by Rodger's boss to not ask him about it. I wonder what ever happened to Rodger. Last thing I knew he was having a rough time of it.

- Rich, 1:27 AM |

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